If you haven’t made the pilgrimage to Obamaland and/or you’re not currently steeling your bladder and freezing your appendages off on the Mall, get thee to a cable or network news broadcast. And preferably one on a big screen — let’s face it, the Internet may not do this one justice.

So, yeah, 2008 happened. We watched, read, and blogged as the biggest international clusterfuck in our lifetimes (with apologies to any Great Depression survivors who read blogs) leeched the blood from our stocks, home prices, and 401Ks like Bela Lugosi on a 5-month bender. Cable newscaster speeches started sounding like the pre-climax villain soliloquies in [...]

It’s pretty safe to say that no one will look back on 2008 and say “Jesus, what a boring year that was.” Those of us who make it ’til New Years (bankers, step away from the ledge — your account balance is nothing resembling your worth as a human being) may even look back on [...]

By no coincidence, it’s much more fun to write about crappy movies than good ones.
Also, for the record, I’m not an atheist — I just wish the people who make a living preaching that God exists could do a little better job of explaining why.
And finally, a comparison that needed to be made. [...]

It’s hard not to pick up on all the little mantras as you go through life–those pedagogic sayings and catchy idioms meant to jog us out of our daily bitchings. They spring forth from Hallmark cards, insurance ads and suburban church message boards, until they’re lodged in the “wish I could unlearn this” portion of [...]

One of the nice things about getting older is the number of gods in the universe starts to shrink. I used to have boatloads of gods. They mostly consisted of My Elders — not so much the distant ones, like Reagan and Chuck Robb and Larry Hagman — they were too abstract to rule the [...]

The funny think about splitting up with someone after many years is that you find yourself totally reconfigured as a person. All the things you thought you knew about yourself–those qualities you’d pasted onto your mental bulletin board as “You” and pulled out whenever some shmuck in a family gathering or job interview asked you [...]

I’ve never had much to write about sex. Call it prudishness, call it the last remaining shreds of a desire for privacy, but I’ve always operated from the default setting that nothing I had to say on the matter was all that interesting. We all have sex, we all like it, we all let it [...]

I can be reasonably tough . I didn’t shed a tear when I broke off the corner of my elbow in 7th grade or when my lower back decided to spontaneously decombust, I have no qualms about telling the jerk at the bar to stop calling me “sweetie,” and I’ll look a burly deliveryman in [...]

This piece also appeared in The Huffington Post.
Last week, I had a forced identity crisis. As it did for plenty of other women/writers/people who consume far too much media, Emily Gould’s infamous cover story and the resulting maelstrom sat in my thoughts, roiling and churning until the inside of my head looked like something envisioned [...]